Two Days Gone
by AvengersIsLife
Summary: Pepper returns to Avengers Tower, expecting it to be nice and clean, the way she left it. Oh how wrong she is.
1. Pepper

"Are you kidding me?! I left for two days! _Two days!_ And I come back and the tower has been destroyed? Oh my _GOD _Tony!" Pepper screamed, staring around at the colossal mess. Beer bottles lay smashed everywhere, the kitchen looked like it regurgitated all of the food that used to be stored in its cabinets, and dirty laundry lay crumpled underneath piles of debris. The room bore evidence of a recent hulk attack; there were large holes in the walls, and tables and chairs were smashed to splinters, but Bruce was nowhere to be seen. There were scorch marks, as if lightning had struck the floor, and Pepper spotted Mjolnir sitting on top of a broken table. The god of thunder himself was sprawled out, surrounded by a fort of pillows and blankets.

Concealed behind the wall of his squishy fortress were numerous boxes of pop tarts that Thor had been guarding with his life before he passed out. Tony had his hands wrapped around an air soft gun, and a water gun, sleeping peacefully (for now) on the kitchen counter, surrounded by half drunken beer bottles. Steve was passed out in a dark corner of the room, curled up in a ball, still damp from water Tony had undoubtedly attacked him with.

There were arrows and nerf darts everywhere; sticking out of the walls, snapped in half on the ground; one arrow was even sticking out of a glass window that was now severely cracked. Most of the arrows and nerf darts, however, were lodged into Thor's fort; one arrow was enhanced with a grappling hook, with a line that connected to an upper air vent. Pepper looked up; Natasha and Clint were both snoozing peacefully in the vent, still grasping their weapons; Natasha had switched out her gun for a nerf gun, but it looked as though it had been enhanced to shoot farther, with more accuracy, and with more speed.

The overall accumulation of the debris was extremely overwhelming, and mixed with the strong smell of alcohol, Pepper couldn't handle it anymore. She sighed, then walked back out of the tower, dialing the number for the cleaning crew as she left.


	2. Tony

**I decided to show it from the other's point of view! Sometimes before, sometimes after Pepper comes back. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Tony groaned; his head felt like it was about to split open. He pulled himself up and looked around.

Strange men were moving about dusting this, cleaning that, picking up trash.

His brain throbbed as he tried to remember what had happened. The last thing he could recall was challenging Barton and Romanoff to a drinking game...

He heard familiar voices coming from the kitchen, so he picked himself up off of the ground and made his way to the kitchen. Natasha sat on top of the refrigerator (Don't ask how she got up there), with Clint on the counter just beneath her. Steve was leaning against the wall, an ice pack placed over a large purple bruise on his forehead. Bruce was sitting on the floor, his back against a cabinet, his knees pulled up to his chest. Thor had a monstrous box of pop tarts wrapped in his arms, but he didn't seem to be in the mood to eat them.

Pepper stood in the middle of the room, glaring at all of them, seeming to be in the middle of a rant. Tony caught sight of her, and turned to leave the room, but it was too late.

_"Anthony. Edward. Stark."_

Tony winced. Her voice sounded _extremely _dangerous. He wasn't getting out of this one.


	3. Thor

Thor didn't understand; why were they after his poptarts?

He had specially ordered them from Lady Potts before she left from her meeting, but now, the people he used to call friends were shooting things at him and his beloved food! He would not stand for this.

The Captain Of Americas had tried to explain to him that they were under the influence of the brown substance from the bottles, similar to Thor's own ale and mead, but Thor would not listen. They were after his poptarts, and that's all that mattered.

Once Lady Romanoff and Man Of Hawk's Eyes got into their brains that they wanted his pastries, they became intent on stealing the, from him. Thor did not approve.

Taking any squishy object he could find, he constructed a fort around him and his precious food, shielding him from the attacks from the assassins. The Man Of Iron then decided to join, picking some weapons from his lab.

Unfortunately for Thor, the assassins took to the vents, giving them a perfect view of their target.

The Man Of Iron soon got bored of shooting at Thor, so he aimed at closer targets. The Angry Green One was the first to be attacked. He stood the weaponry of Man Of Iron for a few minutes, before turning green, and growing into his monstrous size. He crashed through the room, into the kitchen, then to upper floors of the tower.

The assassins were becoming irritating, so Thor took Mjolnir into his hand, and summoned lightning. That was the last thing he remembered before he fell asleep, and woke up the next morning to a man trying to pick up his boxes of poptarts. (Let's just say he'll think twice before picking up a God's poptarts again.)


	4. Steve

Steve had had enough. He was being tormented by Tony endlessly, squirted by the water gun, and bruised by the air soft gun. When one pellet came and hit him in the head, he was knocked to the ground, and didn't bother to get up.

Tony had already drunken himself stupid and broke out the hulk, causing major damage to the tower. Not to mention Romanoff and Barton had joined in, blowing things up and shooting anything that moved.

He couldn't imagine how pissed Pepper would be when she got back. It would be pretty bad. He had promised her he would look after everyone, but he had failed her. He curled up and feel asleep in his soaking wet clothes.

When Steve woke up, Pepper was fuming, running about, observing the clean up. Steve sat up, wincing as he felt the bruise on his head. Pepper rushed over to him, shoved a cup of coffee in his hands, then told him to go to the kitchen. She didn't seem mad, but she wasn't exactly little miss sunshine either. In fact, she seemed more exhausted than anything. He didn't blame her; dealing with the Avengers was a very tiring job.

When Steve entered the kitchen, he found Bruce, sipping his coffee, his eyes unfocused and bloodshot. Steve cleared his throat, and Bruce looked up, then nodded, acknowledging his presence.

Bruce tossed an ice pack to Steve, who put it on his head mercifully. They both sighed, waiting for the rant sure to come.


	5. Bruce

Bruce had tried his hardest to control himself, but as soon as that third air soft pellet hit his arm, he had enough.

He felt his blood go cold, switching from red to green. He felt his muscles growing, his legs stretching to their limit, his body quickly turning green.

He let out a roar, smashed a table, dodged a few arrows from the unseen assassins, then rushed to the kitchen, smashing everything in his way.

Not having control over his actions, Hulk destroyed everything that came into view.

Tony's suit? Smashed.

Pepper's expensive vase? Shattered.

The new flat screen T.V.? Pulverized.

The bottles in the bar? In fragments.

He rampaged around until he calmed down, passing out as his skin slowly turned back to it's original color. His last thought before he lost consciousness was how much trouble he would be in if Pepper came home.

* * *

"Bruce? Bruce. _Bruce._ Get up. The cleaning crew needs to get through."

Bruce flickered open his eyes. He screamed inwardly as his eyes focused upon a certain strawberry blonde.

"Oh my god. Pepper! I'm so sorry. Tony shot me and I couldn't control it. Don't blame him, he was drunk. I'm so sorry."

Apologize flowed out of Bruce's mouth, but Pepper held up her hand.

"It's fine. I'm just mad at myself for actually thinking you guys could handle a couple days without me. Evidently not. Go down to the kitchen. There's some coffee waiting for you."

Pepper threw some clothes at Bruce, having the courtesy to keep her eyes away from him, due to his lack of clothing, other than the tattered remains of his pants.

Bruce slipped on the pants and shirt, nodded at Pepper, then shuffled out of the room, his cheeks burning from embarrassment.

As Bruce reached the kitchen, he found two men carrying Tony out of the kitchen, having just finished cleaning up the once demolished room.


	6. Clint

Clint didn't think accepting Tony's drinking challenge was a goo idea, but he went along with it anyways. He hadn't had a day off from S.H.I.E.L.D. for a few moths, so he was going to enjoy himself. Surprisingly, Natasha had agreed to join in; Clint hadn't expected his fun-killing partner to agree to the game, giving that there was a very large likelihood that everything was going to go wrong, but she did.

It started out with two beers, which turned into twenty. How the three of them were still up walking around, Clint didn't know. What he did know was that he was seized with a sudden desire of poptarts, being hoarded by an overprotective god. Clint nudged Natasha into wanting the poptarts too, and soon, they were forming a plan of attack.

Unfortunately, their plan was thwarted when Tony grabbed an air soft gun a proceeded to attack everyone in sight. They retreated to the vents, where they had a perfect view of the god and his poptarts. Clint grabbed his arrows and Natasha took up her enhanced nerf gun, and they waged a war on the fort below.

Halfway through the battle, right after Steve passed out, Tony climbed up onto the counter and began to sing _The Star Spangled Banner_ at the top of his voice.

Natasha and Clint shared a glance before Clint knocked a tranquilizer arrow and shot it at Tony. It hit it in his arm, and he fell unconscious onto the kitchen counter.

Thor, turning desperate, summoned Mjolnir, and lit up the room with lightning. Natasha, who was lax after her many beers, asked Clint if she could shoot an arrow. He obliged, and wrapped his arms around her, setting her hands in the appropriate locations to shoot.

"Let's shoot the lightning," she had said.

Clint agreed, helped her adjust her aim to the neon white light, took her hand, then released the arrow.

It passed through the lightning, and became lodged into the window. The air vents rang with Clint's and Natasha's laughter.

"Thor's passed out. Come on, let's get the food!"

Natasha yawned, then stretched out onto the vent.

"Mm K."

Clint shot a grappling hook into Thor's fort, then glanced back at Natasha. She was fast asleep.

Clint smiled, watching the rise and fall of her chest. He wasn't so interested in poptarts now. In fact, he too was feeling a little drowsy.

He snuggled up beside Natasha, then lay his head on his quiver, quickly falling asleep as well.


	7. Natasha

When Natasha woke up, the first thing she registered was her intense headache. The second thing she took in was the heavy breathing of the man beside her.

"Clint," she whispered, nudging the archer's arm.

"Clint. Wake up before I punch you."

Nothing.

Clint woke with a start as something hard hit him in the arm.

"Oww!"

"You're such a baby."

Natasha looked through the vent, startled to find an unconscious Thor and Tony sprawled out on the floor below while strange men moved about, cleaning the remnants of the night before.

"Crap. I guess Pepper's home."

"We're dead."

"Yep."

Natasha pulled out one of Clint's grappling hook arrows, jabbed it into the vent, then shimmied down on the string. Clint followed close behind.

As soon as their feet hit the ground, Pepper came bustling out of no where. Natasha and Clint froze up at the sight of the angry red head.

"In the kitchen please."

They didn't argue, and made their way there as fast as possible.

They said hello to a very dejected Bruce and an injured Steve, grabbed some coffee, then listened for any sounds of Pepper approaching.

Suddenly they heard someone yell, and a few moments later, Pepper marched in, dragging a very upset Thor who had his arms wrapped tightly around a large box of poptarts.

The rant began.

"I left you all alone for two days. _TWO DAYS. _Is not destroying the tower too much to ask? I have a news station coming in four hours to do an a run through of Avenger's tower for the biography, and it's a total mess! I cannot believe you all!"

Steve and Bruce looked increasingly upset, while Natasha and Clint tried not to look worried; they had been lectured by Fury and Coulson plenty of times before, but Pepper was a completely different person. She had a fire in her eyes that made Clint and Natasha shiver.

When Pepper started pacing the room, Clint and Natasha hopped up onto the now clean counter, and then Natasha spied the space above the fridge. Clint saw it at the same time too. They locked eyes, and had a silent furious discussion over who would get the space farthest away from the red redhead.

Natasha won, and when Pepper wasn't looking, she pulled herself up there while Clint moved farther back on the counter, farther away from Pepper.

All of the Avengers flinched at the remarks coming from Pepper's remarks as her anger reached it's peak.

As if on cue, Tony sauntered into the room, looking as bad as he actually felt.

_"Anthony. Edward. Stark."_

They all winced. She sounded_ extremely _dangerous. They weren't getting out of this one.


End file.
